Archive for the ‘Cats’ Category

Rough as bags.

October 9, 2008

Both me n the lovely Mrs are proper poorley.a tough of a cold i reckon, And seeing as we both feel rough it aint man flu! One of the bad things about a late summer holiday is when ya come back ya freeze ya nads off.

News here in Hood Town about a cat killer takes over the local press knocking muggings,stabbings and robberies onto the middle pages.now i hate cats as most folk know but we seem to have a nutter going around sticking screwdrivers in cats heads..Must cost him a few quid in tools…Mind you ya can get a full set for a quid in those cheap shops..I would like to read of dead cat with a pair of pliers up it’s arse!

Anyroad i’m off to lace the garden with poison ,Hey i’m down to only that stinking black cat and the fat ginger bastard..The broken glass is working well.

Have a good one and keep ya pussy indoors eh!

In and out like Ronnie Biggs.

September 16, 2008

Just back from the dentists..Good bloke my man knowing that i don’t like the place i was in and out in 10 minutes minus a tooth and plus a numb face… All for under 50 quid…Mmmm i could think of a lot more i could do with that 50!

The above image was knicked from me mate Pinksy’s site, Kind of gives me one of those evil genius smiles to look at it as i never supported um and the crew in there hated me for it.. Fuck um. The rest of the shops here are making a packet at the moment as i hear the new Morrisons will not be trading until mid November, Not that it will bother us cuz we do our monthly shopping online and only use the local shops for fresh stuff, veg, fruit etc but i reckon that will change once Mozzers is up and running, A customer gain for them and a bonus for us as i do like to shop rather than key in my order. Bring it on.

As i am missing a tooth i shall be munching on a few wild mushrooms in a broth tonight while the rest of the crew enjoy some jerk chicken..I might be able to force a bit of it down me if i am lucky..i love jerk chicken me.

Anyroad the numbness in my face is easing off so i am off to take a couple of pain killers to ease the pain and nip on the settee for a bit of a nod. Have a good one you lot and take care out there. Oh i i managed to bowl a tomato at that filthy black cat today,I only wish i had a brick at hand. Meee Owwwww! I hope our resident squirrel has its fucking eyes out.

Just the ticket.

August 19, 2008

Our flight tickets arrived this morning, bringing us one step closer to the beach.. On the bad new front that stinking black cat turned up in our garden again today..i don’t know how it made it through the razor wire but it weren’t too chuffed at having a golf ball lobbed at it’s arse! I would love to see it dangling from the wire one morning.

A nice night had last night with plenty of fizz to help us celebrate our special day..now i feel a bit of a dull ache as an aftermath..ahh well it’s only once a year eh?

Off up the shops now for a gloat.. Only a few weeks till Mozzers takes over..

Have a good one and take care out there.

Cold pussy.

July 29, 2008

I hate cats!

Are you looking at my bird?

July 21, 2008

This morning must have been a bumper bug day in our garden as we were visited by a crowd of birds in a feeding frenzy, it is good to see the long tailed tits back again as they are becoming regular visitors here. We are noticing the numbers rising as less and less of those flea ridden moggies enter the garden so i am well chuffed about that. I hate cats!

Kind of a salad feel to today so i am off up the shops for a bunch of veggies and some crusty bread later, hey there might even be some news on the new retailer..Then again maybe not as i was talking to one of the staff up at the Co-Op the other day and was told that they (The staff) would be told next week..All this excitement is killing me.

Anyroad i’m off to watch the tits for a bit. Have a good one and take care out there.

Poor parking…Made me smile.

July 18, 2008

Well we are half way into this weeks stint at the factory and all has gone well so good news there..even better news is some daft fucker on one of those mobility wagons has managed to drive under a lorry here in Hood Town..Laugh or what? Ban the fucking things i say!

Not disabled..Just a fat fuck!

Still no news from the Co-Op about the changes but no news is good news eh? I bet some of the deadwood staff there can feel the grim reapers breath on their necks.. Soon …It’s coming soon!

Oh and it seems someone in long Eaton as a cat shitting in his garden big time and is getting his revenge…Can’t fault him really.

Anyroad i am off for a bucket of tea and a fist full of fags.

Have a good one most of you..

Old damp pussy.

June 29, 2008

A good day out yesterday as i managed to bag myself a few shirts for the hols and we nipped into see one of Mrs Bs work collegues on the way which gave me the chance to handle her pussy..a 20 odd year old bag of bones with a manky face and a dribbling habit…been ages since i had a bit of old pussy on my lap..

Check out the drool…yuck!

Oh and i managed to get some guz gogs unall..three punnets of um..i do like a guz gog me.

Another stabbling here in Hood Town the victim must have given the attacker a funny look..it’s the way of the world nowadays.

Have a good one.

 

A full squad..A full week.

June 26, 2008

A good week at the factory..Dave the belt has slotted in like a custom built cog so all is well there.And we bumped into Dark n Dangerous yesterday so we caught up on the goss from the old place..Going down hill fast by what we heard..justice!

I reckon Dave will be ready for solo flight after next weeks night shifts and that ain’t bad cuz there is a lot of different practices to master but he has grasped it well and has fitted into our team quickly.

Them bastard cats are still invading so i have fitted a few more defences and i reckon i have got the garden cat proof now, perhaps i should post a warning sign? Mind you cats can’t read so i reckon a dead one in a noose might give um a clue.

My first weekend off for ages coming up and i am well looking forward to nipping into the Bell to look at the refurb,I might even have a pint while i am there. i have a bit of shopping to do and the Bell is allus part of any trip into Hood Town for me. I would have added a link to the Bells website but it has not been updated so nip over to Stuarts place for a bit of history about it..Nice one mate.

Anyroad i am off for a brew and a fag..Have a good one you lot and stay safe as even a kids party ain’t fun around here anymore! BASTARDS!

 

Meeee Owwww!

June 12, 2008

Pussy proof & proud!

June 11, 2008

Well i reckon we are now fully cat proof.And with a good stock pile of stones we are ready for anything..i reckon one of them cats must have laid an egg as i found a shell in the garden yesterday???? Must review the cctv when i get time.

It is good to see i can now post comments again on the Nottingham Evening Post website..i reckon some folks would have missed me on there .Eh Mike?

My mate Dave the Belt starts at the factory in the morning so good luck to him,I ain’t back till saturday night shift but i shall catch up with him when i start my day the week after. Dave should fit in well as we don’t perform like the old factory..no shafting going on , just hard work and a good laugh.. see ya next week mate.

i am cooking up some Southern Fried Chicken for tonights meal so not a lot of work to do there and i know that the family like it so we are sorted. A nice quiet night in with a bit of holding hands in front of the tele..Nice!

Anyroad i am off for a shower n a shave.Have a good one and take care out there.